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Sex With Love is …

sex is

Hollywood, Bollywood, and the dark and seedy studios off 3rd avenue would have us believe sex is love.  We’ll sex is not love.  Sex is sex.  Love is love. Sex with love is fantastic. Sex without love is the porn industry.

We’ll that’s the truth because anyone can have sex.  In fact too many people have sex without thinking about the 1 million and one repercussions from engaging in the feel-good but fleeting bodily fluid exchange.  Who thinks about AIDS, STD’s, or the possibility of having a child when in the throes of passion?  Responsible people that’s who. But not my 13 year old mother. She was not old enough to be responsible.  She did not have the life experience or self-love and self-respect necessary to say hell no, not without protection. Nope just focused on the moment or too inexperienced to even know what was happening. Willing yes but ignorant for sure.

Then 9 months later I surprised her and burst out into the world.  Seriously she did not even know she was pregnant.  I came as a complete and utter shock. So immature and inexperienced she had no clue she was even pregnant. But I am one of the lucky ones.  I was adopted by a couple who wanted me and who had enough education and life experience under their belts to actually raise me.  No, children do not come with an owner’s manual and they do not raise themselves.  So if we do not properly nurture, care for, respect, love and educate ourselves we sure can’t do this for another human being.

Sex is great when the HUGE responsibility that goes along with it is respected and honored.  That is why love makes sex so great.  Love is responsible, caring, kind, loyal, honest, and dependable.  Love is forgiving, reliable, and true.  Love wants the best life for all involved and seeks to get the knowledge and skills necessary to help create that best life.

When the values of love accompany sex then WOW the universe explodes in a Tantric meteor shower of trust and emotional security. And when the values of love are absent, well little Regina’s enter the world, many destined to fend for themselves without guidance, without their dreams supported, and without learning how to create a successful life filled with love, compassion and purpose.

Sex without responsibility is like walking a tight-rope holding a vial of nitroglycerine. Sex with responsibility is magical and a deeply spiritual experience.  The kind of experience we all want but sadly do not get by thinking sex is love.