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Action Helps Stop Worry

You are not your problems

For many years I worried. About my job, relationships, family, the future, of going to hell, other people’s opinions of me. You name it and I worried about it. But worry was like a heavy blanket that smothered the life out of my present. And, not once did anything I worried about come true, or if it did then the outcome was a fraction of the degree that I imagined it would be.

Worry does not control the future. Worry does not prevent life from hurting at times. Worry is a useless activity that sucks the joy out of us.

I taught myself to stop worrying when I started striving to end each day without regret, to not go to bed angry, to control what I can control (me), to prevent what I can prevent, and to have faith in something greater than myself to handle all the rest.

RYS 067: Remember Your Actions Teach

In this Episode:

 

While it is said the greatest legacy we leave is children, I believe the greatest legacy we can ever leave is choosing how well we live. Part of leaving the greatest legacy we can is to make certain we take the time, have the patience and love necessary to raise a child by being the strict gatekeeper of what behavior we model for them. And we must care what children are exposed to.

• To do our very best to most positively influence children we must stop passing the buck and own complete responsibility for the truth it is our actions that teach.
• We must show children appropriate ways of dealing with anger, how to peacefully stand up for themselves and others, how to be responsible, and how to be accepting of difference.
• To be able to show children the best way to live, how to love and respect themselves, how to not be abused, and how to set healthy boundaries, we must know how to do these things for ourselves.

 

Romancing Your Soul ™ is a show where Regina gives you the keys to create a joyful life. In a world filled with limitless challenges and stress, who can listeners count on for real-life solutions? Just check in with Regina Cates, acclaimed author, positivity junkie. Regina is a champion of heart whose common sense tips will make your relationships better, your communication clearer, and your boundaries healthier.

 

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To subscribe to the podcast, please use the links below:

 

Click Here to Subscribe Via iTunes

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Leave a Review for the Podcast

If you haven’t left a review I would greatly appreciate it if you would take a minute to leave a rating and review of my podcast on iTunes by clicking on the link below! It’s extremely helpful for the show and getting my positive words out worldwide.

As a ‘Thank you Gift’ for your review, please send a email with “I left a review” in the subject line to: Regina@RomancingYourSoul.com letting me know you left a review, and I will send you my pdf on “How-to Set Boundaries Out of Love for Yourself”.

To leave a review, click HERE. When you get to the next page, click the blue button “Listen in iTunes”, listen to an episode, and click on “Ratings and Reviews” across from my photo. I am grateful for your review!

To receive a FREE chapter of my book “Lead With Your Heart”. Fill in your name and email under…Join Our Heart Family and Receive a FREE Gift! Click HERE.

 

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Yes You Can, When You Think You Can

Victor-over-challenges

Often I receive emails from people who say, “Regina I just can’t” …do whatever it is they want to do to rid themselves of suffering.  Honestly who says we cannot?  A fearful mind that has a mind of its own. That’s who.  We tell ourselves we can’t and we believe it.

Not once did accepting an excuse (it’s easier said than done, or I just can’t get it together, or I’m trying, or what does it matter anyway, or I can’t …etc.) help me lose weight, stop gossiping, stop smoking, stop cutting myself and others down, stop allowing myself to be mistreated, etc. Excuses did nothing to help me create a happy, responsible, stress-free life. The excuses I made were attempts to justify why I was choosing not to make the changes I knew I needed to. Excuses gave my mind permission to beat me up. Excuses robbed me of my power.

I took my power back to create the life I have when I stopped accepting my own excuses. No, it’s not always easy to follow through and take the necessary action. But it is the only way for me to get from point A, the goal I want to accomplish, to point B, accomplishing the goal.

YES YOU CAN! Step one – stop accepting your own excuses.  Love yourself more than that and make yourself take the actions necessary to reach the goals you set for yourself. There is no one coming to your rescue. YOU must be your own hero!

RYS 066: Do What You Can Beforehand

In this Episode:
One of the most valuable lessons to learn is the importance of being prepared. The actions we take beforehand can and do save us time, energy, and in many cases lots of money. No, we cannot realistically prepare for each and every life event, but we can prevent much suffering and regret by taking action to be as prepared as possible.

• A fundamental part of living a heart-centered life is doing our best to prepare ourselves to take advantage of life’s opportunities and to overcome its challenges.
• Often we get so caught up in the daily grind we don’t take time to actually evaluate ways we can do life more efficiently.
• From education, to career, to relationships the more we prepare the better off we are.

 

 

 

Romancing Your Soul ™ is a show where Regina gives you the keys to create a joyful life. In a world filled with limitless challenges and stress, who can listeners count on for real-life solutions? Just check in with Regina Cates, acclaimed author, positivity junkie. Regina is a champion of heart whose common sense tips will make your relationships better, your communication clearer, and your boundaries healthier.

 

Regina PC cover 300x300

 

 

To subscribe to the podcast, please use the links below:

 

Click Here to Subscribe Via iTunes

Click Here to Subscribe Via Stitcher

 

Leave a Review for the Podcast

If you haven’t left a review I would greatly appreciate it if you would take a minute to leave a rating and review of my podcast on iTunes by clicking on the link below! It’s extremely helpful for the show and getting my positive words out worldwide.

As a ‘Thank you Gift’ for your review, please send a email with “I left a review” in the subject line to: Regina@RomancingYourSoul.com letting me know you left a review, and I will send you my pdf on “How-to Set Boundaries Out of Love for Yourself”.

To leave a review, click HERE. When you get to the next page, click the blue button “Listen in iTunes”, listen to an episode, and click on “Ratings and Reviews” across from my photo. I am grateful for your review!

To receive a FREE chapter of my book “Lead With Your Heart”. Fill in your name and email under…Join Our Heart Family and Receive a FREE Gift! Click HERE.

 

Follow us on Facebook HERE

 

RYS 065: Thank Those Who Help You

In this Episode:

 

We receive much satisfaction from honoring those who help us. Whether it is in our business relationships, or with family and friends, our heart receives great fulfillment from letting people know how much they mean to us and how grateful we are for their support. And, it makes their heart feel good when we say thank you.

• The fundamental reason for our existence is to love and be loved.
• One way we love is to say “Thank you.”
• Appreciation establishes a heart-connection between the giver and receiver.

 

Romancing Your Soul ™ is a show where Regina gives you the keys to create a joyful life. In a world filled with limitless challenges and stress, who can listeners count on for real-life solutions? Just check in with Regina Cates, acclaimed author, positivity junkie. Regina is a champion of heart whose common sense tips will make your relationships better, your communication clearer, and your boundaries healthier.

 

Regina PC cover 300x300

 

 

To subscribe to the podcast, please use the links below:

 

Click Here to Subscribe Via iTunes

Click Here to Subscribe Via Stitcher

 

Leave a Review for the Podcast

If you haven’t left a review I would greatly appreciate it if you would take a minute to leave a rating and review of my podcast on iTunes by clicking on the link below! It’s extremely helpful for the show and getting my positive words out worldwide.

As a ‘Thank you Gift’ for your review, please send a email with “I left a review” in the subject line to: Regina@RomancingYourSoul.com letting me know you left a review, and I will send you my pdf on “How-to Set Boundaries Out of Love for Yourself”.

To leave a review, click HERE. When you get to the next page, click the blue button “Listen in iTunes”, listen to an episode, and click on “Ratings and Reviews” across from my photo. I am grateful for your review!

To receive a FREE chapter of my book “Lead With Your Heart”. Fill in your name and email under…Join Our Heart Family and Receive a FREE Gift! Click HERE.

 

Follow us on Facebook HERE

 

Question What Makes You Fearful

lost-authenticity

When I was young I was taught there is a hell where we go after we die if we are bad while alive and a heaven if we are good.  As a little girl and young adult I lived in constant fear. The images of people suffering and burning haunted me when I was asleep and while I was awake. I once threw a gum wrapper out of the car window and was certain I was going to hell. I lied to my mom or took $5 out of my dad’s wallet without permission and was certain I would burn for all eternity. Overall I was a good kid who was convinced I was doomed from the start. It was an absolutely horrible way to live.

One day in my late teens I got fed up with living in fear and said, “Screw it! I am already in hell living in such fear and dread.” That day I realized how much of my religious upbringing was focused on controlling me through fear. But that did not make any sense to me because fear never aligned with the loving, supportive, forgiving God I knew in my heart/soul.

So I began questioning everything I had been taught to believe. Yes, there may be an all-powerful source to which I must answer to when I die, but I have not feared it in years. I decided to live each day striving to be the best person possible. Not from fear of punishment or expectation of reward. But for the simple fact that doing my best each day keeps me from living in hell now and that allows me to experience the peace and love of heaven while I am very much alive.

RYS 064: Being Right is Highly Overrated

In this Episode:

 

We can be stubborn and we can be argumentative. But being obstinate and confrontational adds nothing positive to resolve conflict. Ego creates illusions or deceptions in forming the perceptions we have of ourselves, other people, and situations. Ego quickly justifies a “my view is right” attitude even when we are wrong.

• Clinging to the ego-motivated notion we have to be proven right only adds fuel to the fire in the disagreements we have with others.
• Just because we disagree with someone does not mean that person is wrong.
• Leading with our heart we care more about the health of our relationships than we do defending our egocentric pride.

 

Romancing Your Soul ™ is a show where Regina gives you the keys to create a joyful life. In a world filled with limitless challenges and stress, who can listeners count on for real-life solutions? Just check in with Regina Cates, acclaimed author, positivity junkie. Regina is a champion of heart whose common sense tips will make your relationships better, your communication clearer, and your boundaries healthier.

 

Regina PC cover 300x300

 

 

To subscribe to the podcast, please use the links below:

 

Click Here to Subscribe Via iTunes

Click Here to Subscribe Via Stitcher

 

Leave a Review for the Podcast

If you haven’t left a review I would greatly appreciate it if you would take a minute to leave a rating and review of my podcast on iTunes by clicking on the link below! It’s extremely helpful for the show and getting my positive words out worldwide.

As a ‘Thank you Gift’ for your review, please send a email with “I left a review” in the subject line to: Regina@RomancingYourSoul.com letting me know you left a review, and I will send you my pdf on “How-to Set Boundaries Out of Love for Yourself”.

To leave a review, click HERE. When you get to the next page, click the blue button “Listen in iTunes”, listen to an episode, and click on “Ratings and Reviews” across from my photo. I am grateful for your review!

To receive a FREE chapter of my book “Lead With Your Heart”. Fill in your name and email under…Join Our Heart Family and Receive a FREE Gift! Click HERE.

 

Follow us on Facebook HERE

 

Tough Love is Still Love

boundaries-strong

One of the most challenging aspects about caring for others is accepting we CANNOT control or change anyone else but ourselves.  Our adult child is being abused in relationship, or faces jail time, or is hooked on drugs, or cannot keep a job, relationship, etc.  Yes, these things are hard to witness. And no, we cannot make their choices or live their life for them.

Each of us has our own journey in life. That means when we reach adulthood and we stumble, we must choose to pick ourselves up. We cannot do that if someone is there to soften our fall or always pick us up. We do not learn, grow and make positive permanent changes if other people try to do our work for us.

It’s not easy to watch those we care for collapse under the weight of their negative choices. Sometimes we witness this over and over again. But we cannot fix someone. Unless that person wants to fix him/herself, our words will fall on deaf ears and a closed heart.

What we can do is set boundaries to bring a higher level of awareness to the relationship we have with those who are hurting themselves and others.  We can focus our energy on staying centered and balanced so when the people we love decide to pick themselves up and change, we are there to support their efforts. That is why it is called “tough love.” Yes, it is hard and yes, setting boundaries against unacceptable behavior is still love.

RYS 063: Acts of Kindness Make Your Heart Sing

In this Episode:

 

Acts of kindness provide you deep contentment. Knowing you’ve helped brighten someone’s day makes your heart feel full long after the event itself has passed. Thoughtfulness is the action that emotionally connects you others.

• Kindness is having empathy so you become enriched by another’s happiness.
• Being kind creates lasting pleasant memories.
• Not only does being kind keep you heart-centered, researchers have found that kindness makes your heart physically healthier, too.

 

Romancing Your Soul ™ is a show where Regina gives you the keys to create a joyful life. In a world filled with limitless challenges and stress, who can listeners count on for real-life solutions? Just check in with Regina Cates, acclaimed author, positivity junkie. Regina is a champion of heart whose common sense tips will make your relationships better, your communication clearer, and your boundaries healthier.

 

Regina PC cover 300x300

 

 

To subscribe to the podcast, please use the links below:

 

Click Here to Subscribe Via iTunes

Click Here to Subscribe Via Stitcher

 

Leave a Review for the Podcast

If you haven’t left a review I would greatly appreciate it if you would take a minute to leave a rating and review of my podcast on iTunes by clicking on the link below! It’s extremely helpful for the show and getting my positive words out worldwide.

As a ‘Thank you Gift’ for your review, please send a email with “I left a review” in the subject line to: Regina@RomancingYourSoul.com letting me know you left a review, and I will send you my pdf on “How-to Set Boundaries Out of Love for Yourself”.

To leave a review, click HERE. When you get to the next page, click the blue button “Listen in iTunes”, listen to an episode, and click on “Ratings and Reviews” across from my photo. I am grateful for your review!

To receive a FREE chapter of my book “Lead With Your Heart”. Fill in your name and email under…Join Our Heart Family and Receive a FREE Gift! Click HERE.

 

Follow us on Facebook HERE

 

Yes, You Can, When You Do

SuperheroA

Recently a woman told me she can’t change her life because “it’s just too hard and much easier said than done.” I really dislike these and other self-limiting “I can’t” phrases.

Regardless what we want to accomplish we MUST support ourselves and that requires us to remove self-limiting language. We stop and ask, “Why would we intentionally sabotage ourselves before we even get started by allowing ourselves to think whatever we want to accomplish is too hard or not actually possible for us?” We don’t!

I asked what actions she had taken. She said, “I haven’t taken any. I’ve only thought about it.” I asked, “Could it be that it only seems too hard or easier said than done because you have not DONE anything yet?”

Together we made a list of small action steps. Today she proudly informed me, “Regina it’s not true that it is too hard or easier said than done. When I actually started doing I realized I could and that put an end to my thinking I couldn’t. Taking action I now know I CAN. Even when I stumble, I CAN still get back up and move forward.”

I love when we realize we are our own powerful superhero agent of self-change.